I have a dream. Most people have dreams. Sometimes they’re achievable and sometime they’re not. I mean if you dream of being Taylor Swift, Barak Obama, or Kanye West (not sure why you would want that but there we go), then that’s obviously an unachievable dream (unless it’s one you gain in your sleep). But there are other dreams like becoming a Nurse, writing a novel, or travelling to another country. These types of dreams are often very possible for many people.
My dream is to change the world.
It’s scary to see that written down. Even scarier that i’ve written it in bold. SCARY BOLD WORDS.
Two things that are important to me are creativity, and helping people, and I want to combine those two things. I’m currently unemployed, and i’m applying for jobs but I’m not sure I can really imagine myself actually doing them. Going to an office every day, working 9-5 (or longer)…I just can’t picture that being my life. I’m applying because I need the money. I need to survive. Slave to the wage. I live in London. Can I survive here without a full time job? The cost of rent makes me question whether I can even survive here WITH a full time job. Is it possible to not have a job but have money. Well that’s what I’m trying to figure out, because working for something I don’t care about just creates the most low and unsatisfied feeling in the pit of my stomach.
I write poetry. I write other things too, but poetry seems to be the thing that i’m most in love with right now. I’m trying to go to open mic nights, write everyday, gain as much knowledge, practice, and experience as possible. It’s quite daunting, but also really exciting. Poetry is a massive outlet for me. I can talk about whatever I want. I can talk about my deepest darkest thoughts, moan about public transport, consider all my weird and wonderful deliberations, and swear as much as I fucking want. That freedom makes me feel alive and I think that’s incredible. Right now I care more about my poetry than getting a full time job. I feel like it shouldn’t be my priority, but it is.
I want to use my poetry as a way to make a living, as well as a way of helping others, but how on earth do I achieve that?! It’s hard to even know where to start. It seems so insane, to the point that saying it out loud to anyone would probably just result in their ridicule. The lack of job security, the lack of confidence, the lack of money, and the lack of knowledge and skill necessary to even start is overwhelming, but for some reason I can’t seem to let it go. Someone should probably tell me that it’s just a hobby and offer me a job in a call centre.
I’m a complete novice and newbie, but I want to perform, get published, and put out lots of stuff online. I want to find my voice, my style, and develop it. I want to learn and improve. I want to be talented. In turn I want to use this talent to connect with underprivileged kids, people in prison, people with mental health issues, people in the LGBTQ community, those who are suffering, as well as just everyday regular people, because after all every single one of us go through issues in life.
I want to encourage other people to write, and perform poetry. I want to show that it’s an amazing way to express yourself. I want to reach out to these people and work with them. Poetry and spoken word is more than just talking about a tree in a field, there are hip hop and rap influences, you can be humorous and silly, you can rant about politics and the state of the world. There is so much more to poetry than what you’re taught in school. Being creative, talking about things that matter, and using it as an outlet is such a positive way to use this art form, and I want to promote that.
As well as this I want to combine music, illustration, typography, sewing, fine art, dance, film, apps, installations, and photography, with poetry. Bringing together different art and media in the form of events, and exhibitions. Not only do I want to promote poetry itself, but the actual content of poetry too. Powerful messages can be exhibited in poetry as well as other art forms, and combining this all together is something I want to be a part of. Imagine an amazing poem presented on a typography poster, or wooden letters hanging from a washing line, or a poem read alongside a ballerina, street dancer, or silent film. There are so many ways to be creative with poetry.
So there we have it. My dream is to be a poet and use that as a way to help people. How I achieve that I’m not entirely sure. I’m not really one for shameless self promotion, I’m trying to do it more but it’s SO HARD. I need to read, write, and perform more. I need to build some kind of team, come up with a realistic plan and budget, somehow find money, and the means to achieve all these goals. I have the privilege of parents who are helping with me with money for a year, but I want to earn my own money, in a way that is meaningful and makes me feel like I have purpose. Right now it seems unachievable, but who knows maybe one day I will figure it out.
I’m on a journey and if you want to be a part of that, connect with me, and let’s change the world together.